This story begins as most stories do.
It’s got a ‘Once upon a time’ and a happy ending, too.
It begins in a land far, far, away.
It’s got princes, and dragons for the princes to slay.
It’s got a maiden in distress, a dwarf in a dress,
Gold in a chest, and a villain none the less!
There’s an enchanted kiss for an enchanted girl,
Who needs an enchanted prince to save the world.
It’s got a bad guy with powers, a dwarf with a glower,
An apple that’s sour, and a magical tower!

There’s a fire-breathing dragon, and a sea-monster, too!
And a boat that the sea-monster is waiting to chew.
There’s a man on the boat who plays the kazoo.
St. Nicholas Oswald of Cusco, Peru.

There’s even a guy who hangs from vines, swinging his sword.
But he does that for fun. Just cause he’s bored.

Now I shall tell you this magical tale
Of excitement, adventure, danger, and peril.
A story so moving, and touching, and sad,
It’ll bring tears to the eyes of your dad.
Okay, now. I’ll give it a shot.
Once upon a…Darn. I forgot.